I've always posted answers to these not so much for myself, but to let people who read this know more about me through my responses. I'm not sure if that is good or bad...but here goes again.

Friday Five -- May 2, 2008
This week's questions were suggested by </a></b></a>alysonl.

1. What's one of the nicest things a friend has ever done for you?
A) I have had so many people do so  many nice things for me that it is too hard to pick the one nicest....really. When Cheryl died there were so may friends and family who pitched in and did things for us. That was so nice...and most just did it without asking and in very unselfish ways.

I don't mean to pick out one, but there was the friends who lived in Conn and drove down to NYC to pick Kimberly up at school and drive her home the night Cheryl passed away. I know I was prepared to drive right down to get her, and in my mind I was going to be fine driving down and back...but in hindsight, I was probably not thinking clearly because the stresses on both Kimberly and me were so high that I'm not sure if I could have made it....safely. So I thank Lee and his dad for that.

I had another situation a long time ago when I was working as a Co-Op student at Instrumentation Labs. I had been working about 80 hours a week, and was staying very late one night doing something and I went outside to go home and my car was dead. (Was that my 1969 VW I think)

Anyways, I came back in and was pretty much alone so I called an engineer Tim at home and asked for a suggestion of what to do....and he didn't even hesitate and told me he was coming back to work to take me to his house.

When we got to his house his wife had prepared me dinner and the couch was all set-up for me to sleep. They offered me some Valium to calm me (which I didn't take) and then Tim helped me with my car the next morning when we got back to work. I was just so surprised that someone I barely knew would step up and together with his wife, would reach out and help so quickly and without even really being asked.


2. What's one of the nicest things a stranger has ever done for you?
A) Again...lots of things here too If I think hard enough. I've had notes left on my car telling me things about issues with my tires that might have been unsafe. I've had a person find my wallet and return it  totally intact.

It is true that I have had issues with strangers (like being attacked by a truck driver with road rage once in Nashua), but that sort of thing is very rare.......I'd say that I've been treated very well by strangers and friends alike!


3. What is a trait in another person that you instantly admire, and that draws you to them?
A) Honestly, hard work, unselfish.....generally good morals. But understand, I find that none of us bipeds are perfect, starting with me....so it isn't perfection that attracts me because I'd be a very lonely person. (could not even live with myself at that point either)

But a person who is honest, and not afraid to work, and reach a hand out to others....that's a real find. Luckily there are lots of good people out there....we just can't look for perfection I suppose.

And then, If I can be good enough to be their friend too....that's just great.


4. What is a trait in another person that instantly repels you, and prevents you from forming a close relationship with them?
A) I think the operative word here is "close relationship"....because my parents always taught me that I can deal with and befriend anyone in the world so long as I understand them well enough....so if I know someone is a liar, I can deal with them so long as I keep that in mind.

Ditto for cheats, and so on.... (My parents also convinced me that I can also at times learn as much from a person's faults as I can from a person who might be a good mentor.....so throwing away friends and relationships with people who don't totally "measure up" might be throwing away good lessons learned too.....)

I guess there are plenty of people I have not made friendships with, so I'm not so perfect at not judging.....but I suppose I'm happy if I can get myself to not hate a person or group of people for a particular thing.

I suppose I try my best to understand that the world is not black and white, but rather an infinite number of shades of gray....so there is no need to HATE the people you don't LIKE. (sometimes easier said than done.....back to that imperfect "thing")


5. Time to vent: tell us about something rotten someone has done to you.
A) No venting from me....for what purpose? Perhaps I'm lucky in some ways to have been born with a bad memory, because it leads me to try and forget things that are just not so critical to remember in order to leave room for things I need or want to hold on to.

 I'd like to think that even if I had a mind like a steel trap that I would be big enough of a person to forgive and forget.....but I am human after all.

Truth be known, I don't think I've had very many horrible things done to me by people.

It's not that I haven't seen bad things.....I was a juror on a particularly gruesome murder trial, my daughter had a particularly bad thing happen to her...and I even remember my parents having a few things in their lives.....but remember and learning from an incident is one thing....dwelling on the bad doesn't see to be very productive to me. (though I can certainly understand how people do it)

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